Life in a Wormhole: How Can You Miss Me if I Never Leave? #eveonline

First, a quick behind-the-scenes update: CCP contacted me and told me they'd changed their minds about the whole media account thing, so it looks like I'm back to writing about EvE stuff for the foreseeable future. I will probably keep doing the Life_in_EvE twitter account, however, and just figure out a way to tie it in here.

Now then, where were we...

---

"Oh man, Ty's bringing his Proteus," Em murmurs over comms. "Shit just got real."

"You told me to hurry," I reply. "This is what I was already flying."

I'm dropping out of warp next to our lowsec connection in response to Tweed announcing he's spotted a couple haulers once again using our system to move goods from their home out to the public markets. This hasn't gone very well for anyone in the past, but in this case the pilot gets a pass -- it turns out he's flying a blockade-running Viator transport which is both nimble and able to warp while cloaked. This means we get virtually no time to lock the ship before it's clear of our slapdash ambush and safely back at home. Bugger.

"Clearly, we need to blame Tweed for this."

"Sorry guys," Tweed answers. "I'll try to find something slower and stupider next time."

"See that you do."

---

Tweed's as good as his word.

I log in the next day in response to a summons from CB, and work to sift through the information everyone's sharing with me over comms. There's another hauler. It's an Iteron III. It's cloaked up right now, but it's not going anywhere like that. It's at... a tower? What?

Oh, no, it's in the middle of taking down a tower, an hour-long process that (according to the publicly visible timer) should wrap up in about 26 minutes, thus dropping the force field and leaving the hauler (probably still lurking around cloaked) defenseless and the tower itself entirely yoinkable.

By this point, several of our pilots have slid into position in cloaked up stealth bombers, ready to wreak havoc. The only concern is the Rapier-class force recon cruiser that's sitting at another nearby tower owned by the same corporation, but since it's the only other ship beside the Iteron III that actually boasts a conscious pilot, it's not too worrisome. I slip into the system in Twilight Sparkle and warp down the unanchoring tower as well, ready to get up close and personal with the Rapier if he comes out to rescue his corp mate.

The time ticks by, the forcefield dies, and a wild Iteron III appears, only to be greeted by a double handful of bombs that vaporize the ship and the pilot's pod in short order.

The game is on! Get ready for reinforcements! I warp in close to the deactivated tower, holding cloak and ready to pounce when the Rapier shows up.

Twilight Sparkle puts on her War Face.


Except, of course, the Rapier doesn't show up. Or move, actually -- the pilot's apparently busy toasting a bagel or fixing up a cup of coffee Just. So.

Ah well. There's still a lovely tower to pick up and haul home. Ichi hops into a hauler of our own and makes off with the structure. Once he's off the grid, the rest of our gang resumes cloak and vanishes into the woodwork. Not the most fiery of PvP engagements, but the job was done well, everyone bombed the right target (no mean feat when everyone's invisible at the start), and we have a tower to sell the next time we head to market.